Broken, Hurting Soul

Here I am
A sitting duck
Vulnerable
For that which so easily entangles me

I have sinned
Against God
And against man
Justifiably reproached by those who love me

I long to flee from sin
Say, “No!”
Turn my this ship around
But how

I haven’t the strength on my own
Where do I begin
How do I start
To turn my life around

I’ve tried…really I have
It seems like every door is closed
Slammed shut in my face
What am I supposed to do now

I don’t even know if I believe in God
But I do believe in the devil
For he has deceived me
I believed his lies…hook, line and sinker

Drugs and alcohol
They were supposed to numb the pain
Help me feel good about who I am
Make me forget about everything I’m not

But before I knew it…sin took hold of me
What kind of son betrays his own mother
The one who loved me
Always freely gave

I went from the occasional
“Little white lie”
Before long
My heart grew cold and calloused

Now I’m
Trapped by my iniquity
With ease I’ve hurt and used
Anyone in my path

Society tells me
I’ve served my time
Paid the price
For the wrong I’ve done

Now I’ve been set free
I want to change…I really do
People tell me they are praying
Not sure what that means…but please don’t stop

Yes…I desperately need God’s help
But I also need
A helping hand
From real live flesh and blood

Someone who understands
Knows what I’m feeling
Encountered those demons within
That I’m fighting with all my might

Someone to hold me accountable
Show me how to get along
What to do…what not to do
How to live in the day to day world

Someone who understands
What seems like baby steps
Is a giant leap
For this broken, hurting soul


Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 10, 2009


When I read the first lines of this poem to my husband Chris he thought, “Oh no…what has Susan done that she needs to confess?” But I assured him it wasn’t my story I was writing about…but instead a compilation of some of those broken, hurting souls we know. It is by the grace of God…I’ve been spared the wayward path of some.

But we all know some of these people…family or friends whose lives have spiraled out of control. Or maybe…just maybe…it’s me that God has delivered from my wayward past. May God help these broken, hurting souls.

Thank you to those who have a heart to help. Those who offer a helping hand, prayer, wise counsel from God's word…and tough love. This poem is dedicated to Gary Peterson who heads the Prison Ministry at Kindred Community Church.