On My Own Power

So how do I know…when what I’m doing, is on my own power and not God’s?

'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty. Zechariah 4:6

It’s not necessarily something bad or sinful…but I know that I’m overexerting myself and nearing the end of my strength. I hit wall after wall…and I’m not exactly acting very gracious or Christ like in response to those walls. And some of those walls are people…and they deserve a better response than what I give.

I get frustrated and my nerves are on edge. The fruits of the spirits…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control...are not very evident in my daily life right about then.

When I look closer to see what’s going on…I see that I’m not staying connected to the Source of my Strength…Jesus Christ. I let the busyness and demands of this world…take first place. I get distracted by things, which while of value and necessary, they are not the most important thing. Right about then…I feel discouraged…or angry…or feel helpless, alone and unloved.

That’s when I most need to realize…that it’s time to refocus and get my priorities back on track. That’s also when it’s hardest to reach out to God.

But thank goodness I have a Father in heaven…just waiting for me turn to Him. He doesn’t leave me or forsake me…but patiently waits. He doesn’t leave me alone either. Instead…the Holy Spirit within me…is kind of nagging at me. He’s reminding me of God’s word…and the wisdom contained therein...to help with any situation that I might encounter. But mostly He’s reminding me that I need to turn and reach out to God.

Sometimes I think God must just want to swat me right upside the head. He’s saying, “Yo, Susan…what are you doing? Get a clue kid. When are you ever going to learn? You need me, you need to stay connected to me through my word and through prayer. Alright…if you insist…knock yourself out. I’ll be here waiting when you come to your senses and are ready to come back.” Golly, gosh gee wiz…it’s a darn good thing my God is so loving, patient and forgiving.

The parable of the prodigal son remains one of my favorites…in part because I know that God is like that father…who is awaiting his sons return. He’s watching and waiting…and while the son is afar off, he sees him coming and runs to greet and welcome him home. He embraces him in his loving arms…and kisses his son whom he missed.

Thank you God…for loving me. Thank you for sending your Son Jesus Christ to pay the penalty for my sins…so I might be with you in heaven one day. Thank you for giving me your Holy Spirit within me to guide and direct me daily. Thank you for not giving up on me or turning your back…when I need you most. How blessed I am! Thank you Jesus!